It doesn’t matter how drunk you are—it’s not okay to say these things.
1. “I prefer solids.”
No. Just. No.
2. “Could I just get some ice cubes to go?”
Oh, certainly! Anything else I can get you, Your Majesty?
3. “I throw up geckos for fun.”
4. “You would make a terrible Sky Masterson.”
Let me stop you right there.
5. “You’re under arrest for serving alcohol to minors.”
Bartenders HATE hearing this!
6. “More spit, please.”
Everyone gets the same amount of spit. Why would you deserve more spit than everyone else?
7. “How do I get this inside of me?”
Bartenders are there to make drinks, not teach you how to ingest them.
8. “Are you sad because, like all humans, all bartenders must eventually die?”
Okay, just because someone’s a bartender doesn’t mean they have to die eventually.
9. “I’m more of a food guy myself.”
10. “Is it cool if I piss this out later?”
No, actually, it’s not.