We had our hopes high, but these folks didn’t come through this time.


1. Brad

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Normally we can count on the Brad-man to rouse party guests with one of his many great anecdotes about working on a cruise liner, but much to our chagrin, he spent most of the BBQ on the phone with his sick kid.


2. Janice

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We only invited Janice because she makes the world’s best potato salad, but you can tell she barely put any effort into making it this time around. I know she’s in the process of getting a divorce, but come on.


3. Angela

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Damn it. Angela used to be our ace of spades, but she has been in a funk since she put her dog down last month.


4. Vivek

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On top of utterly failing to give my backyard cookout a little of the “anything goes” attitude he’s famous for, Vivek also left after 30 minutes. Thanks for nothing, Vivek.


5. Me

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I should have known that inviting myself to this BBQ wouldn’t turn out well, yet here I am, useless as ever. Ugh.


6. Samantha’s kid

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What a disappointment.

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