It’s a massive step for any relationship, but do you really know what comes with the territory of cohabiting with your significant other? Here are a handful of things no one tells you when you start living together.


1. Sometimes you won’t agree on who gets to do the Opening Monologue when you wake up in the morning.

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It’s true. Some days, you’ll wake up in the morning and simply won’t be able to decide whose turn it is to do a tight five about the day’s top stories.


2. You’ll spend at least 10 minutes each day detangling your toes.

Every. Day. Ugh.


3. Your fathers will begin tandem-dreaming.

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It happens quicker than you’d think. One minute, you’re moving in together, and the next, your fathers are entering one another’s dreamscapes and gradually building a shared consciousness.


4. Your pets might not get along. If you have a bird and your partner has a bigger bird, you’re going to have to keep them from fusing into one giant bird.

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It’s all part of compromising.


5. Your significant other may bring a masked man who follows them wherever they go who you did not previously know about.

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When it comes right down to it, there are some things you just can’t control. All you can do is try your very best to welcome the masked man and provide him with food and shelter.


6. But in the end, it’s nice to finally have someone whose night screams will drown out your own.

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