Mother knows best!


1. You’re the one they call whenever they need to be unstuck, as a group, from the laundry chute.

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2. At the movies, you sit in the row behind your friends to watch their necks for signs of viral meningitis.

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3. You always smell the pool before you let your friends dive in.

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4. You’re the one who’s addicted to slot machines.

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5. Every time you give birth, it’s to a new cool friend for the group to chill with.

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6. You’re the one who makes the sauce, and you’re the one who brings the sauce.

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7. Every time the group goes tap-dancing, you’re the one in the middle who does that windmill grand-finale thing.

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