Before you take your next trip to the big blue-and-yellow store, keep these hacks in mind and save yourself some time and money!

1. Buy family-size: If you’re looking to save a few easy bucks at IKEA, remember that getting one big couch for your family to use over time could actually be cheaper than buying each family member their own couch!

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2. Purchase an IKEA grave plot: Customers who buy one of IKEA’s in-store grave plots receive a 15 percent discount on all bathroom products for life, as well as the comforting assurance that they will be laid to rest inside their nearest IKEA location.

3. Say the store’s full name: To get half off on all products, just walk into any location and say IKEA’s full name: I Know Every Animal.

4. Steal a pencil maybe: They have those tiny pencils for customers to use, and you could steal one if that really appeals to you. It’s not like normal-size pencils are expensive, though, and they also have erasers, but stealing IKEA pencils is an option.

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5. Kill the IKEA minotaur early: If you don’t get to the center of the store and slay the IKEA minotaur, it’s just going to hang over your head the entire trip. Customers who get it out of the way right off the bat can shop leisurely for decorative home goods.

6. You can leave your grandparents there: This is a clever money-saving hack that only expert IKEA shoppers know! Abandon an elderly loved one on a floor-model sofa and the store will take care of them for the remainder of their days, no questions asked.

7. Walk into the store and exclaim “Take me to the thrones!”: If you burst through the doors of IKEA and loudly say “Take me to the thrones!” an IKEA employee will escort you to a secret wing of the store where there are many regal and ornate thrones for you to sit in so that you can be the queen. There is the Starkstol (Swedish for “strong chair”), which is a huge throne that will take you 1,000 years to assemble, but is fit for the most glorious of all monarchs. There is also the Högtpall (Swedish for “loud stool”), which you are only allowed to sit in if you have killed someone.

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8. Wait until “Free Everything Friday” to shop: The store hasn’t had this event before, but if it ever announces that everything is free on Fridays, that would be an ideal day to visit.