Via Seatgeek.com

Carolina is on his mind, but these things sure aren’t.


1. Pushing yourself outside of a creative safe zone

Via Biography

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After 30 years of acoustic guitar and soft-rock vocals, it’s safe to say that James Taylor has never experienced the combined feeling of anxiety and fulfillment that comes with expanding your creative horizons.


2. Challenging fans with a song that is even mildly thought-provoking

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With lyrics like “I walked out this morning and I wrote down this song / I just can’t remember who to send it to,” it’s clear James Taylor hasn’t the faintest idea here!


3. Having a number-one hit that isn’t a cover of a song that a legitimately talented artist wrote

Via Rolling Stone

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Stealing Carole King’s “You’ve Got A Friend” was a convenient shortcut to stardom, and who knows that better than James Taylor?


4. Not constantly wearing dumb hats that are made for little boys

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Pretty much everyone in the world understands this one, but James Taylor never will!


5. Achieving success without having wealthy parents to provide a safety net for you

Via Mikeyminizback.wikia.com

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Not too hard to become a musician with Mommy and Daddy’s money in your pocket!


6. Being friends with Usher

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Yup. This one’s never gonna happen for James Taylor!


7. Having a thick head of lustrous hair into middle age

Via Boston-theater.com

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No matter how hard he tries, James Taylor will never know this simple pleasure!


8. How it feels to come home to children who love you in anything more than a superficial manner

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James Taylor is totally in the dark on this one!


9. Leaving a mark of any size on music history

Via Seatgeek.com

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Sorry James!