Society has made some serious strides in recent years towards embracing body positivity, and here’s yet another encouraging story that proves just how much our standards of beauty have evolved: This thing seems overweight for whatever the hell it is, but it is still beautiful!
So amazing. What an inspiration!
Honestly, we’ve got no clue what this thing is, but just on first glance it looks like it has to be a pretty big version of whatever the hell it’s supposed to be. Like, whether this is some kind of mammal or amphibian or toxic fungal mass, it’s gotta be a uniquely gigantic representative of its genus, as you’d definitely remember if there were other colossal oleaginous blobs like this wobbling around through the world. In this new era of celebrating nontraditional body types, voluptuous curves are an asset, and we think this unabashedly curvy creature is beyond gorgeous. Yes, it appears to weigh some 900 pounds, but we wouldn’t want it any smaller! It is absolutely owning its many love handles and stretch marks, and we are SO here for it because there is NOTHING sexier than confidence!
Slay, blob! You are stunning just the way you are!
If whatever this thing is can feel, then it has undoubtedly felt self-conscious at times for being so enormous in a world where you rarely encounter other SUV-size mounds of living adipose flesh. But this thing has seemingly gotten over any and all insecurities, because it is out here straight-up flaunting its goodies like a runway model, knowing that it is perfect just the way it is. Honestly, when we first saw it slowly lurching its way down the sidewalk, we didn’t even notice its immense proportions—we were way too captivated by its jaw-dropping beauty and swagger. It is positively GLOWING, and no matter what the hell it is or what purpose it serves in the ecosystem, we love it for the fierce diva energy it exudes.
Get it, blob!
Suffice to say, this thing is an absolute body positivity icon. We hope that anyone who is struggling with body image issues will look at this quivering pile of sexy and realize that beauty isn’t defined by waist size. Beauty is an attitude, and this monstrosity has attitude for days. Keep being you, blob! You are perfect and we wish we knew what you were.