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Ditch The Personal Trainer: 5 Pretty Bad Stretches You Can Do At Home

Personal trainers are expensive, and sometimes it can feel next to impossible to fit a trip to the gym into your busy schedule. But not to worry! This list has you covered with five pretty bad stretches you can do at home for free! They all suck and none of them require a personal trainer!

1. Spread Your Fingers Out

No Equinox membership? No problem. Simply stretch your fingers out as far as they’ll go four or five times, and you’ll have completed this boring and relatively unhelpful stretch! Your hands will feel either a little more limber or pretty much the same in no time. Tell that to your friends sinking hundreds of dollars into Crossfit each month!

2. Chair Sit

This stretch might look like just sitting in a chair, and in fact it is just sitting in a chair. It’s no good, stretching wise, but it costs zero dollars and is easy to do at home or at the office—and that’s a win!

3. Feet Near The TV

To do this easy, bad stretch, follow one simple rule: Get those feet near the TV! Yep, you don’t need a spotter or a fancy machine—wherever you are in relation to your television, just stretch your feet a little closer to it! As far as what muscles this is for, we have no idea. Legs, maybe? This stretch is not going to help you, but you can try it for FREE today. Your wallet will thank you!

4. Horizontal Cheek-Puff

It’s time to quit your $35-a-pop cycling classes, because there are so many other, worse exercise options out there. This one is a stretch called the horizontal cheek puff, in which you lie on the ground and puff out your cheeks. It’s an equally bad stretch for both your face and your body, and it’s low-impact enough that its effect on your skeletal system has gotta be pretty negligible. Honestly, we’re not sure what the point of stretching is anyway—to make your body floppier? Sounds unnecessary. Regardless, kiss the pricey SoulCycle studio goodbye and give this worthless stretch a go!

5. The Plain Stand Up

Standing up the plain way is a simple exercise you can do at home for zero dollars and with zero benefit to your body. If you feel like you’re standing, you’re doing it right! This innovative and bad stretch is based on the principle of “standing there,” which is not employed by many other gyms or fitness coaches, and probably for good reason. Yep, your personal trainer and your own body are both going to hate this list of awful stretches you can do at home!