America’s favorite fast food company just gave the public some fascinating new information about its corporate mascots that is certain to captivate customers both young and old: The CEO of McDonald’s has revealed that Grimace is the larval stage of Ronald McDonald.
What an intriguing development!
In an official statement released this morning, McDonald’s CEO Steve Easterbrook revealed that Grimace is a larva that will one day pupate into Ronald McDonald, the adult version of its species. Check out Easterbrook’s explanation of Grimace’s astounding biology below:
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
I would hereby like it to be known to the public that Grimace is the larval stage of Ronald McDonald. Ronald McDonald is the adult version of Grimace, and the two of them are of the same species. Every 300 years, Ronald McDonald crawls into the ball pit of a McDonald’s play area and lays an egg there. The egg hatches into Grimace, who is a baby version of Ronald McDonald in the same way that a maggot is a baby housefly. Ronald McDonald (the adult Grimace) feeds its baby Grimace by finding nuts and berries in the forest and bringing them back for Grimace to eat.
After 100 years of eating, Grimace enters a cocoon and begins a metamorphosis during which his amorphous purple body slowly transforms into the colorful, more fully developed adult Ronald McDonald. This metamorphosis process takes an additional 200 years. When two centuries have elapsed, Grimace emerges from the cocoon, now an adult Ronald McDonald. The new Ronald McDonald eats the old Ronald McDonald (its own mother), and begins looking for a mate. Ronald McDonald mates with the Hamburglar (the male variant of the species), and after mating, Ronald McDonald bites the head off of the Hamburglar (for reasons of biology). Ronald McDonald then lays a new egg in the ball pit of a McDonald’s play area, and the beautiful process begins again.
The current Grimace will eat the current Ronald McDonald sometime in the year 2273.
I hope this announcement helps you understand McDonald’s better. Thank you for eating at our restaurants.
So interesting! It’s awesome to learn this cool backstory to some of the most recognizable corporate mascots in the world. Now whenever we see Ronald McDonald, we’ll know that it’s only a matter of time before her child, Grimace, devours her and takes her place! Other corporations take note: This is how you run a company!