Dude, you’re better than this.
You’re not in college anymore! Throw your clothes in a hamper; don’t just let them pile up on your bedroom floor for weeks.
What are you: a Planet Hollywood, or a mature adult? Get that framed dress off the wall.
Come on, you’re never going to use these. It’s time to give them away.
Your days of piling up snow in the living room are long over. Be a man and make dozens of tiny piles.
Nobody wants to be the geezer still holding onto his accursed mirror.
Maybe you got away with this when you were 24, but now it’s time to shape up.
You can’t go crying to the Other You every time you have a problem. You’re not a child, and you don’t need a second body to do all the work for you.