From interplanetary travel to electric cars, billionaire Elon Musk is on the cutting edge of some of mankind’s greatest technological breakthroughs. We asked the visionary inventor and business mogul five questions about his life and career, and his answers will blow you away.


1. What ignited your passion for technology?

Imagining The Jetsons characters’ sex lives is what ultimately pushed my mind to new places. I realized that after George Jetson has loud, passionate sex with his only true wife, Jane Jetson, both of them are going to be very thirsty, and they’re going to need to buy sugar water to rehydrate. But how will the Jetsons be able to get to the store to buy post-coital sugar water if there are no cars in the future? I realized that this would be a big problem, so I decided to invent a high-tech car that could exist in the future so that the Jetsons could get into it and drive to the store for some hot, delicious sugar water after having sex with each other loud enough for their children to hear through the walls. I love technology.


2. Why are you so dedicated to building electric cars?

I once saw a movie called Back To The Future, and obviously I thought, “My god, what if you were stuck in the past where your mother wanted to have sex with you? What if you were trying to drive away from your sex-hungry mother and your car ran out of gas? Your mother would catch up to you sitting in your car with your empty tank, and there you have it, you’ll have to have relations with your own mother.” After watching that film, I said, “All cars should run on electricity so no car will ever run out of gas, forcing someone to have relations with a horny young version of their own mother.”

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3. Is there a dream business venture of yours that you’ve always wanted to start but haven’t yet?

I’ve always wanted to harness the power of bugs. Not sure for what exactly. Maybe they could carry barbecue sauce and bring it to you or something. I would call the company Bugs, Inc., and the logo would be a big scary bug. That’s all I’ve got.

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4. Where do you see public transportation 20 years from now?

The end goal for transportation is gluing a sword to the side of a bus at neck height so that when the bus is near America’s most wanted criminals, it can drive up and cut their heads off. The question of that is, how do we get bus drivers to a state of heightened awareness where they can be sure they are cutting the head off an outlaw, and not a regular citizen. I personally believe the answer is combining the cold, calculating computing power of a bus with the brusque aggression of a bus driver into a cyborg. When you hear my contemporaries talking about the “singularity,” this is what we’re talking about. Until then, we’re just trying to make better sword glue.

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5. How do you want to be remembered?

I want my life story to be the perfect book you can buy your dad when you run out of things to buy him for Christmas. It’s nonfiction, entertaining, but also very tech-oriented, which should interest and impress any father out there.

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